To be really effective an anger management technique must a) work rapidly, b) be able to break through all the clutter in your mind and, c) change your state and get you to refocus on the moment on hand. Ideally an effective anger management technique should be able to get you to see the situation that is angering you in a new light, maybe even permanently change a pre-existing bias that you have.
Most importantly, however, an anger management technique needs to change your state, both physical and emotional, from one of agitation into a different place. We actually have a lot more control over our state than we realize. Most of the time though we are operating on auto-pilot, with our emotions being buffeted about like a loose leaf is blown about by the wind.
Don't believe me? Well, a recent study in the journal Science described a study in which our moods were found to be impacted by simple things such as what we sit on. This study found that people who sit in a hard cushioned chair are more likely to describe a task as hard than people attempting the same task who were sitting in a soft chair. Totally unconscious, but having a huge impact on our mood.
So there are all these things having influence on our moods that we just passively allow to drive us. A good anger management technique must help us to take active control of our state.
Which brings us to one of the greatest anger management techniques I've ever seen, from the movie "Anger Management": "I Feel Pretty"
Makes you feel better just watching it doesn't it? Now thats a great anger management technique!
Its a great illustration of an effective anger management technique because a) its really funny which changes your state and b) it illustrates how powerful doing something that is both distracting and silly can calm you down in just two minutes when you are feeling stressed, angry or agitated. This is because the part of your brain that controls emotions thinks that whatever you focus on is really happening so if you keep chewing on the thing that upset you in the first place you will stay angry. Matter of fact you might even get more angry. But if you interrupt the thought pattern with something that distracts you, preferably something fun or silly you will find yourself calming down in a matter of moments.
So next time you are getting mad, try the "I Feel Pretty" anger management technique. It really works!!
This is only one of many anger management techniques I can teach you that will help you to change your state instantly. To learn more feel free to give me a call at 301-657-1144 or send me an e-mail at DrJoe@DrJoeJames.com.